11 Christian Marriage Books That Helped Me Prepare for Marriage
When it comes to marriage, the resources can seem endless. As Christians, we know that God is the Author of marriage and the Designer of this beautiful covenant, with its purpose and principles laid out in His Word. Turning to trusted and wise counsel can help us learn how to practically live out these biblical principles.
As I was preparing for marriage, I remember feeling overwhelmed.
What did I need to know?
What was I supposed to read?
What was I missing?
In this guide, I want to share the top 11 Christian marriage books that helped me prepare for marriage. Even now, I continue to return to these resources and draw wisdom from them.
From friend to friend, here they are.
Whether you are single, preparing for marriage, or many years in, I believe these resources can be fruitful.
May God bless you and your marriage.
Tip: Use the resource Internet Archives to find the free e-book version of a lot of these books!
A Note About Christian Marriage
Before we dive in, it’s important to note that Scripture is our ultimate authority.
These resources can be very helpful, but they should never replace Scripture as our ultimate source of truth. For me, these books encouraged me to seek the Word, ask questions when I did not understand, and recognize it’s okay to disagree.
I liked to think of these books as a form of wise counsel—they help to practically apply biblical principles.
Surely, there are other books out there that could be on this list. These are simply the ones that have helped me the most. Please share any recommendations in the comments.
Here are the 11 Christian marriage books I have found especially helpful, covering God’s design for marriage, what to look for in your spouse, preparing for marriage, and learning how to love and honor your spouse.
If you’d like to know more about Christian marriage, check out my post on Christian Marriage Questions and Answers.
The Meaning of Marriage
Timothy Keller
📖 What It’s About
God’s design + purposes in marriage
💡 What I Learned
Marriage is a tool God uses to sanctify us.
It has eternal implications beyond this world.
We must depend on Him to fill us, guide us, and strengthen the covenant between husband and wife.
It is a good thing, but God is greater.
❤️ Why I Recommend It
This book highlights the Lord as the most important member of the marriage, outlines His will, and highlights the importance of viewing marriage through the lens of the Lord and not the world.
👫 Who Should Read It
Anyone considering marriage & married couples
Let Me Be a Woman
Elisabeth Elliot
This book especially stands out to be, because it was formative in my understanding of biblical womanhood. Here, the author is writing a personal letter of wisdom to her daughter who is engaged to be married.
📖 What It’s About
Discovering biblical womanhood + God’s call for women (whether single or married)
💡 What I Learned
The value in taking God at His Word, trusting His design, and surrendering ourselves to Him
Obedience, surrender, and submission to God must become a first priority in our lives.
❤️ Why I Recommend It
It’s vital to understand our identity and calling in Christ before stepping into marriage.
👫 Who Should Read It
This is a book I would have loved to read in my later teenage years, since it helps to create a view of womanhood that begins in those younger years. It has impacted my life significantly. I highly recommend reading it alongside the book below.
The Mark of a Man
Elisabeth Elliot
Similar to the book above, Elizabeth Elliot wrote this book to her nephew. It has such a personal yet practical touch. Friend, I would highly recommend reading this book in conjunction with Let Me Be a Woman.
Understanding the unique and distinct roles and responsibilities of both men and women brought such depth and appreciation to my walk with the Lord.
📖 What It’s About
Discovering biblical manhood + God’s call for men (whether single or married)
Practical ways to live as a man of God
💡 What I Learned
What true manliness is
God’s design for manhood, husbandry, and fatherhood
The high and sacrificial calling of a husband and Father
❤️ Why I Recommend It
As mentioned previously, this book (alongside Scripture) helped shape my understanding of biblical manhood, marriage, and family. I realized these things are gifts from God and are life-giving. They require a life of surrender, self-sacrifice, and partnership with Christ.
It is packed with Scripture and has me turning to the Word time and time again.
👫 Who Should Read It
Teenagers, people considering marriage, anyone who wants to better understand God’s marvelous plan for men and women.
Check out this post on biblical manhood 🙂
Family Driven Faith
Voddie Baucham
📖 What It’s About
A highly informative book on the errors in cultural norms surrounding marriage and family
The unique and valuable roles God has for men and women
The value of the home, family, and the responsibilities they have in discipleship and ministry
💡 What I Learned
The home is a primary place of discipleship and spiritual formation.
Christ can not just be a part of our lives, He must BE our lives.
The importance of not delaying marriage
Reminders that our spouse and children belong to God first.
What true biblical love is
The vital influence of Christian community on a family
Teaching children to make decisions based on who God is, not just based on rules
Encouraging children to ask questions, find the answers, and recognize that their aim is to please God above all else
❤️ Why I Recommend It
Loaded with practical advice on marriage and raising children
Outline’s God’s design and purposes
👫 Who Should Read It
People considering marriage, husbands, wives, parents, teachers, etc.
Anyone desiring to know more on marriage and family
For more on the Christian family, check out this post I made: Christian Family: What Is It?
The Power of a Praying Wife
Stormie Omartian
📖 What It’s About
Each chapter covers a different topic. It begins with a short story, includes a prayer for your husband, and concludes with a few key verses.
💡 What I Learned
The importance of prayer as a primary way we can bring our husbands before the Lord
Praying before we speak is much more effective than taking things in our own hands.
❤️ Why I Recommend It
This book covers topics I never even thought to pray over. It emphasizes the importance of allowing God to be God over your husband, places our trust in Him, and recognizing God is sovereign.
👫 Who Should Read It
Wives + wives-to-be
The Power of a Praying Husband
Stormie Omartian
📖 What It’s About
This book pairs beautifully with the one above, as it focuses on specific areas of a wife’s life her husband can pray over. Similarly, it included guided prayers, Scripture references, and short stories to tie things together.
💡 What I Learned
I haven’t read this one myself since it’s geared towards men, but the Lord has taught me how vital prayer is. It is amazing to see Him move.
❤️ Why I Recommend It
Praying intentionally for your wife
Spiritual leadership through prayer
Praying for your wife’s walk with the Lord, character, calling, and needs
The importance of husbands bringing their wives before the Lord
👫 Who Should Read It
Husbands + husbands-to-be
Eight Great Ways to Honor Your Husband
Marilynn Chadwick
📖 What It’s About
The value of creating a culture of honor in the marriage (Romans 12:10)
Practical ways to support, value, love, and do life with your husband
💡 What I Learned
Marriage should not become commonplace. It should be held in honor and cherished.
We should be a people who love with our whole heart.
❤️ Why I Recommend It
Believing the best, building him up, fighting for him, guarding the home, dreaming together, resting together, and teaching children to honor and love their father are so important!
This book provides practical ways and real-life examples on how to do so.
Marriage isn’t built through big romantic gestures alone. Much of honoring our spouse happens in the ordinary moments of everyday life.
👫 Who Should Read It
Wives + wives-to-be
Tip! I believe husbands can benefit from reading this as well, since it can offer them an insight into the life of their wives.
Eight Great Ways to Honor Your Wife
David Chadwick
📖 What It’s About
The value of creating a culture of honor in the marriage (Romans 12:10)
Practical ways to support, value, love, and do life with your wife
💡 What I Learned
The value in a husband honoring his wife and esteeming her highly
Viewing marriage as gift from God to be treasured
“He who finds a wife finds a good thing,
And obtains favor from the Lord” (Proverbs 18:22)
“An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones” (Proverbs 12:4)
❤️ Why I Recommend It
This book provides practical ways and real-life examples on how to love and honor your wife well, thus honoring and loving the Lord (John 13:34; Ephesians 5:21)
👫 Who Should Read It
Husbands + husbands-to-be
Tip! I believe wives can benefit from reading this as well, since it can offer them an insight into the life of their husbands.
Family Worship: Making Your Home a House of God
John D. Garr
📖 What It’s About
Discovering the biblical foundations of marriage and family life, rooted in God’s original design.
Highlight the value of the home as the place of worship, teaching, fellowship, hospitality, growth, and joy
💡 What I Learned
The home is society’s heart and soul
Renewal of the world begins one family at a time
We must be engaged in meaningful work and worship
Loving marriages lead to fruitful homes
Parental examples
Blessing, affirming, correcting, and discipling children
Planned times for family fellowship + one-on-one time with children
Every fiber of our being should be submitted to God and His instructions
“God first, spouse second, and self last”
Male, female, and child roles
The error in individualism
❤️ Why I Recommend It
“The human family was patterned after the heavenly design… Only when the sanctity of the home is upheld, therefore, is a foundation established for security and growth both in the church and in society”
👫 Who Should Read It
Everyone 🙂
Created to Be His Help Meet: Discover how God can make your marriage glorious
Debi Pearl
📖 What It’s About
Rediscovering the call of Christian women with an emphasis on the home and marriage.
The author presents letters written to her from various women, outline the struggles they face. She then combats them with Scripture and leads women in the ways of the Lord.
💡 What I Learned
What a help-meet is
The value of a cheerful heart and thankful spirit
The Titus 2:3-5 model + the value of mentorship from older godly women
Wisdom on discipling children
The characteristics of the Proverbs 31 woman
❤️ Why I Recommend It
This book cuts through cultural norms and reminds women of their call from God.
It provides practical ways to live for Christ as a woman, outlines common pitfalls, and offers Scriptural references for the points she presents.
👫 Who Should Read It
Women and men benefit from learning about God’s call for women.
For more on biblical womanhood, check out this post.
Eve in Exile: The Restoration of Femininity
Rebekah Merkle
📖 What It’s About
This book examines Rebekah Merkle’s critique of modern feminism and cultural expectations surrounding women, family, and vocation.
💡 What I Learned
So much. This book truly opened my eyes. There is also a documentary if you are interested.
Feminism: what it truly is
What God designed women for: their job and responsibilities
How to use our skills and abilities for God’s glory
Maximizing our design as women
Recovering a sense of importance of the home, making it a priority
The power of love to train and teach
Food, fellowship, laughter, beauty
How to combat the rising cultural norms and replace them with God’s Truth
❤️ Why I Recommend It
This book shows the rising dangers of feminism and the impactful role women can play in restoring God’s original design on earth.
It is full of “a lot of small and seemingly insignificant acts of obedience” that have the power to change our home and the world for Christ—bringing life, love, and the goodness of God.
👫 Who Should Read It
Everyone.
What These Books Taught Me About Marriage
Marriage Is God’s Design
Marriage isn’t something we have to reinvent or look around us to find the answers to. We can look to God’s Word for its purpose and design. Friend, you will be amazed when you do. There is such beauty hidden in the depths of this love.
Marriage Requires Surrender
Marriage isn’t primarily about being fulfilled or fulfilling someone else. It’s not about getting our way or having control. The Lord uses marriage to teach us to offer up to Him the most valuable of all earthly relationships, die to ourselves, and practice humility, patience, forgiveness, and sacrificial love.
Your Spouse Isn’t Your Savior
Your husband or wife cannot fulfill the role that belongs to Christ. Christ must remain the head of each spouse and of the marriage itself. Christ should be the greatest pursuit, passion, and love. All that we do flows from that place. What an honor to demonstrate the love of Christ towards another person on a daily basis. Our hearts must be fixed on and full in Christ before we are able to give ourselves to another person.
Resting under the common authority of Scripture and Christ as the head allows for fruitful change, mutual respect, and purposeful living.
Prayer Changes How We Approach Marriage
Rather than simply trying to change our spouse, we can bring our marriage and our own hearts before the Lord.
Marriage Extends Beyond the Couple
Marriage creates a foundation for family, discipleship, hospitality, and kingdom work.
Being around God-fearing families has shaped and strengthened my faith perhaps more than anything else.
Since marriage represents the union of Christ and the church, married couples get to demonstrate this to the world as they live in submission, humility, love, and commitment to Christ and one another.
Children brought-up around this example are blessed with an illustration of Christ and the church.
The home gets to function as a place of blessing, truth, affirmation, growth, worship, hard work, and friendship.
Which Christian Marriage Book Should You Read First?
Preparing for marriage:
→ The Meaning of Marriage
→ Let Me Be a Woman
→ The Mark of a Man
→ Created to Be His Help Meet: Discover how God can make your marriage glorious
Want to think about future family life:
→ Family Driven Faith
→ Family Worship: Making Your Home a House of God
→ Eve in Exile: The Restoration of Femininity
Want to grow in prayer:
→ The Power of a Praying Wife
→ The Power of a Praying Husband
Want practical ways to love and honor your spouse:
→ Eight Great Ways to Honor Your Husband
→ Eight Great Ways to Honor Your Wife
Final Thoughts on Christian Marriage Books
We don’t have to figure out marriage alone. God has gifted us in so many ways—through His Word, His Spirit, godly community, and wise counsel
These books are amazing, but the seeking does not stop there. We must pursue excellence as we:
- Study Scripture
- Seek wise counsel
- Surround ourselves with people who love the Lord
- Pray for our marriages (present or future)
- Ultimately look to Christ!
Marriage is a beautiful gift, but it is also an opportunity to grow in our understanding of Christ’s love, humility, sacrifice, and faithfulness. May we enter marriage not simply asking, “What can my spouse give me?” but “How can I best glorify God and faithfully love the person God has entrusted to me?”
Marriage lifts our eyes to the goodness of our Heavenly Father. To Him belongs all the glory.
